Augusta Denny’s Figures Only a Weirdo Would Wash Their Hands All the Time

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obsessive compulsive disorder AUGUSTA, Maine — A woman who argued she was fired from Denny’s restaurant because of her obsessive compulsive disorder was dismissed for giving a trucker a cup of free milk, the Maine Human Rights Commission found Monday. The commission’s vote went against its own investigator’s recommendation. In a a 2-1 vote Monday, the commission decided that Erica Kilde of Richmond was subjected to a hostile work environment at the Augusta Denny’s for her OCD but was not fired for her disorder. According to Kilde, her co-workers would call her Miss Perfect and mess with her workspace, which she said she needed to keep in a particular way. “[One of her co-workers] repeatedly rearranged her supplies and demanded half of the work station for his own things. When she stated that his actions caused her to get new medication for her condition, he responded, ‘You just gave me a trophy to hang on my wall,’” (read more at the Bangor Daily News)

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51 Comments on "Augusta Denny’s Figures Only a Weirdo Would Wash Their Hands All the Time"

  1. ‘Anyone’ ‘Their Hands’ I do not read publications whose writers do not know singular from plural.

  2. Me neither!

  3. I mean, me either.

  4. No, that’s not it. I meant: me two!

  5. Er… me to.

  6. Too. I meant “too.”

  7. Or did I mean “too”, with the period after the second quotation mark?

  8. I mean, the British put the period after the quotation mark.

  9. Or is that the English?

  10. Well, I think “British” would include the Welsh, and there’s no tellin’ what they might do.

  11. They don’t even have vowels.

  12. Well, they do, but they’re rationed, like dental appointments.

  13. And the Irish. Hoo boy.

  14. I mean to say, have you read Joyce?

  15. Once upon a time and a very good time it was there was a moocow coming down along the road and this moocow that was coming down along the road met a nicens little boy named baby tuckoo…

  16. Honestly, what’s up with that?

  17. Shouldn’t moocow be two words?

  18. Would it kill this guy to buy a bag of commas and spread ’em around a little?

  19. And I’m not German or anything, but some of those nouns oughta be capitalized.

  20. Dear god, I just imagined Portrait of the Artist as a Young Man written in German. It would be one, one-hundred-twenty-five-page compound word with a verb on the last page.

  21. I know I’m supposed to capitalize god, but I wasn’t talking about Him. I was thinking of his cousin Jeff.

  22. Jeff’s a god, but he’s not that into it, so it’s lower case for him.

  23. vanderleun | June 29, 2012 at 9:48 AM |

    Standing ovulation!

  24. I just had a scary thought. What if James Joyce was sober when he wrote that?

  25. I just had another scary thought. What if I was sober when I read it?

  26. Of course, when I say “I was,” I really meant to write “if I had been.”

  27. Of course, when I say “when I say,” I meant to say ” when I said.”

  28. Of course, I didn’t say anything, I wrote it; but my point stands.

  29. Was that semi-colon OK in that last sentence? The Intertunnel doesn’t like semi-colons, I’m told.

  30. Oh for god’s sake, there’s no hyphen in semi-colon — I mean semicolon — is there?

  31. Or is that a dash I’m not supposed to be putting in there, not a hyphen?

  32. Never mind all that. I think I was supposed to say…

    Dammit. (or is that “damnit?)

    What I would have preferred to have written earlier was: What if I had been sober while I was reading it.

  33. That last one would have been much pithier (more pithy?) if I had used whilst instead of while, wouldn’t it?

  34. Look, I didn’t mean to get all pithy.

  35. I was thinking I’ve written too much, but then I thought:

    And my more-having would be as a sauce. To make me hunger more!

  36. Now that’s some bollixed-up shite right there. Who writes tripe like that?

  37. Google says Shakespeare wrote it.

  38. It sounds like something a reggae bass player would say.

  39. vanderleun | June 29, 2012 at 11:11 AM |

    What reggae bass player would ever say, “Google says Shakespeare wrote it”?

    Mon?

  40. John Kidle | June 29, 2012 at 11:37 AM |

    I think you’re talking about a whole nother matter.

  41. I am disconsolate, as I feel as all this could have been averted if I had put a “Take An Umbrage, Leave An Umbrage” dish next to the Meteor’s cash register in the first place.

  42. vanderleun | June 29, 2012 at 12:14 PM |

    Actually it is well known that spare or lost umbrages are left in the cylinder by the door.

  43. Are you singing Eleanor Rigby wrong?

  44. @aubuchon

    Hey! Its Porky Pig in print!

    Hi!

  45. vanderleun | June 29, 2012 at 1:10 PM |

    “Never try to teach a Porky Pig to sing Eleanor Rigby; it wastes your time and it annoys Porky.”

  46. vanderleun | June 29, 2012 at 1:11 PM |

    But I digress

  47. vanderleun | June 29, 2012 at 3:12 PM |

    And furthermore….. Gerard Manley Hopkins: “The ambition of the Irish is to say a thing as everybody says it, only louder.”

  48. Hopkins? I thought Dylan Thomas said that.

    Did you know Bob Dylan renamed himself after that crazy Welshman Thomas? His real name is George Zimmerman. I have no idea why he shot that black kid.

    Maybe it was Danny Thomas I was thinking of.

  49. ‘Anyone’ ‘Their Hands’

    Hand singular? That’s crazy. Who only washes one hand?

  50. My brother emailed me and said he thought “Who only washes one hand?” was a Zen Koan.

    I told him Zen Koan was a Jewish girl I used to date.

  51. My bad. That was Jen Cohen.

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